You're so hot I'd jack your dad off just to see where you came from.
“L.A. is so celebrity-conscious, there’s a restaurant that only serves Jack Nicholson — and when he shows up, they tell him there’ll be a ten-minute wait.”
Bill Maher
Little Johnny Counts to 10
Little Johnny Counts to 10 The teacher asks little Johnny if he knows his numbers. "Yes," he says. "My daddy taught me." "Can you tell me what comes after three?" "Four," answers little Johnny. "What comes after six?" "Seven," answers little Johnny. "Very good," says the teacher. "Your father did a very fine job. What comes after ten?" "A jack," answers little Johnny.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
My friend Jack claims that he can communicate with vegetables.
Jack and the beans talk.
What is Jack Frost’s favourite mode of transport?
A Tr-Ice-cycle
Whats worse than getting fingered by Captain Hook? Getting raped by jack the ripper.
What’s the best tool to have when your heart sinks?
A Jack of Hearts.