Confused

What kind of eggs does a confused chicken lay?
Scrambled eggs.
What do confused owls say?
Too-whit-to-why?
The bag of flour was so confused.He thought that he saw his friend the loaf yeast-erday.
My ex just sneezed and I accidentally said "bless you"
Now she just staring at the bushes confused wondering who said that.
An Absent Minded Doctor
An Absent Minded Doctor A doctor is going about his business, with a rectal thermometer tucked behind his ear. He goes into a staff meeting to discuss the days activities, when a co-worker asks why he has a thermometer behind his ear? In a wild motion he grabs for the thermometer, looks at it and exclaims: "Damn, some as*hole has my pen!"
A Question of Origins
A Question of Origins My 3 year old daughter came to me and asked: “Mommy, where does poo come from?” I decided it was best to explain it at a level she would understand so I said: “You just had breakfast?” “Yes”, she replied. “Well, the food goes in your mouth down into your tummy. Our body takes all the good stuff it needs out of the food and then what’s left goes down to your bottom and when you go to the toilet that comes out as poo.” She looked confused and stared at me in stunned silence for a few seconds. Then asked: “And Tigger?”
How Many Years Did I Live Again?
How Many Years Did I Live Again? A contractor dies in a car accident on his 40th birthday and finds himself at the Pearly Gates. A brass band is playing, the angels are singing a beautiful hymn, there is a huge crowd cheering and shouting his name, and absolutely everyone wants to shake his hand. Just when he thinks things can't possibly get any better, Saint Peter himself runs over, apologizes for not greeting him personally at the Pearly Gates, shakes his hand, and says, "Congratulations son, we've been waiting a long time for you." Totally confused and a little embarrassed, the contractor sheepishly looks at Saint Peter and says "Saint Peter, I tried to lead a God-fearing life, I loved my family, I tried to obey the 10 Commandments, but congratulations for what? I honestly don't remember doing anything really special when I was alive." "Congratulations for what?" says Saint Peter, totally amazed at the man's modesty. "We're celebrating the fact that you lived to be 160 years old! God himself wants to see you!" The contractor is awestruck and can only look at Saint Peter with his mouth wide open. When he regains his power of speech, he looks up at Saint Peter and says "Saint Peter, I lived my life in the eternal hope that when I died I would be judged by God and be found to be worthy, but I only lived to be forty." "That's simply impossible son," says Saint Peter. "We've added up your time sheets."
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
I’m a little confused as to why everyone keeps giving me legos for my birthday.
I don’t know what to make of it.
I’m a little confused as to why everyone keeps giving me legos for my birthday.
I don’t know what to make of it.
What did the sarcastic otter say?
I think you’ve confused me with someone who builds a dam.
What does a dolphin say when he’s confused?
Can you please be more Pacific?
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because all his uncles were ants.
A werewolf that is confused on what to wear is not a dumb one, instead it is a what-to-wear-wolf.