I recently took a trip to Alaska. We ate at a fancy restaurant where the chef made us an amazing meal from native animals and vegetables we helped forage. I asked if he had ever had whale blubber or seal meat. He said "nah, Iām not really Inuit."
A man faces a violation for adding horse meat to the chicken stew in his restaurant. At the court heās asked why he did it and how much horse meat was in those stew.
āFor the money of course and I solemnly swear I always kept the ratio 50:50!ā
While the infraction caused many unhappy customers, upon seeing the manās honesty the judge decides not to revoke his license. However he in turn must always advertise that horse is part of the ingredients. With a sigh of relief, the restaurant owner pays the fine and walks out of the court house with his wife and friend
He friend asked him āDid you really put horse meat or did you add anything else with the chicken?ā
āNope. Only horse meat and chickenā.
āNow tell me the truth man, come on, it was mostly horse meat wasnāt it?ā
āNope. It was always 50:50... one horse per one chicken.ā
A rich man comes home and immediately starts shouting at his wife.
"I've been looking at our expenses and they are through the roof! What have you got so much to spend on? From now on, things will need to be different!"
"Different how?" the wife asked.
"Well, for starters, if you learned how to cook, we wouldn't need a personal chef. If you learned to clean, we wouldn't need a maid!"
The wife looks at him and responds: "Then we just need to teach you how to satisfy a woman. Then we can let the gardener go as well."
A husband and wife were dining at a 5-star restaurant.
When their food arrived, the husband said: āOur food has arrived! Letās eat!ā
His wife reminded him: āHoney, you always say your prayers at home before your dinner!ā
Her husband replied: āThatās at home, my dear. Here the chef knows how to cook!ā
I was watching an Australian cooking show recently and the audience began applauding when the chef made meringue. Which is odd because... Australians usually boo meringue.
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