Different Jokes

The Husband's Budgetary Concerns A rich man comes home and immediately starts shouting at his wife. "I've been looking at our expenses and they are through the roof! What have you got so much to spend on? From now on, things will need to be different!" "Different how?" the wife asked. "Well, for starters, if you learned how to cook, we wouldn't need a personal chef. If you learned to clean, we wouldn't need a maid!" The wife looks at him and responds: "Then we just need to teach you how to satisfy a woman. Then we can let the gardener go as well."
Q: Did you hear about the pea that changed careers?
A: He went into a different field!
What was the motto of the unique deer? Deer to be different!
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
Date a soccer player. We can go for 90 minutes and know 11 different positions.
My friend bought a different toothpaste this time...
It was a nice change of paste.
What's long, surprisingly bigger than expected, comes in different colors, and everyone wants a ride from?
A limousine.
I know "Good Morning" in 5 different languages
Which do you want to hear tomorrow?
How do Santa’s elves go to different floors in the North Pole toy workshop? They use the elf-avator!
I always take a dump at 11:59 PM. That way, when the clock strikes midnight it’s the same sh**, different day.
During the pandemic, all the children asked to draw pictures of the different types of grass. The children had to submit their grass-essments online.
My friends were talking about what different colours grass they preferred.
I told them they were being gracist.
Why did the ad agency hire a hydra?
She knew how to wear many different hats.
Cherries are actually great at a lot of different sports. Their favorite one, in case you were wondering, is archerry.
Flamingos are known by a different name when they dress up to go out – they call themselves glamingos.
I have a spouse in a different nation.
The Imagination.
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