License

How far can a mango,
If he's got a license but doesn't avocado ?
Did you get your license suspended for driving so many guys crazy?
A blonde was cruising down the highway at breakneck speed when a cop pulled her over.
“May I see your license and registration, please?” asked the cop.
Miffed, the blonde said, “I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you took away my license and today you want me to show it to you!”
Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License? Because she got an "F" in se*.
I peed my pants every time I stood in front of my first-grade class to talk.
That's how I lost my teaching license.
What kind of hunt is a marriage? One where the trapped animal has to buy the license.
The Horse and Chicken Restaurant
The Horse and Chicken Restaurant A man faces a violation for adding horse meat to the chicken stew in his restaurant. At the court he’s asked why he did it and how much horse meat was in those stew. “For the money of course and I solemnly swear I always kept the ratio 50:50!” While the infraction caused many unhappy customers, upon seeing the man’s honesty the judge decides not to revoke his license. However he in turn must always advertise that horse is part of the ingredients. With a sigh of relief, the restaurant owner pays the fine and walks out of the court house with his wife and friend He friend asked him “Did you really put horse meat or did you add anything else with the chicken?” “Nope. Only horse meat and chicken”. “Now tell me the truth man, come on, it was mostly horse meat wasn’t it?” “Nope. It was always 50:50... one horse per one chicken.”
Don't you need a license to be that ugly?
You should have a license for being this dumb.
Yo Mama so short you can see her feet on her driver's license.
What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie?
A License To Krill.
A blonde was cruising down the highway at breakneck speed when a cop pulled her over.
“May I see your license and registration, please?” asked the cop.
Miffed, the blonde said, “I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you took away my license and today you want me to show it to you!”