Afraid

Did you hear about the math professor who was afraid of negative numbers?
He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
Doctor: I'm afraid we've had to remove your colon
Me Why?
The Art of Discretion
The Art of Discretion Six retired Floridians play high stakes poker in the condo clubhouse. A member of the group, Meiers, loses $5,000 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five finish playing the hand standing up. Finkelstein looks around and asks, "So, who's gonna' tell his wife?" They cut the cards, and Goldberg "wins" the duty. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, not to make a bad situation any worse. "Discreet? I'm the most discreet person you'll ever meet. Discretion is my middle name," he says. Leave it to me." Goldberg goes over to the Meiers' apartment and knocks on the door. Mrs. Meiers wife answers and asks what he wants. Goldberg declares, "Your husband just lost $5,000 playing poker, and is afraid to come home." "Tell him to drop dead!" says the wife. "Will do," he says.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Can You Let the Manager Know Please?
Can You Let the Manager Know Please? A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard, which is full and bushy. "Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. "Actually, no," he replies. "Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him." she purrs, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his hair. "I'm afraid I can't" breathes the barman, evidently getting a bit hot under the collar by this point. "Is there anything I can do?" "Yes there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues huskily, touching his lips. "Tell him," she says, "that there is no toilet paper or hand soap in the ladies' room."
Why didn't the frog park on the side of the road?
He was afraid of getting toad.
Why did the Chinese communist party try to cover up the outbreak of the corona virus disease?
They were afraid not everyone could get it.
Woke up with sweats afraid I'd contracted the corona virus...
Changed into jeans and was all good.
Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish.
Doctor: "Sir, I'm afraid your DNA is backwards"
Me: "And?"
When does a brain get afraid?
When it loses its nerve.
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
What do you call a lobster that's afraid of tight spaces?
Claw-strophobic
Why don’t dolphins play basketball?
Because they’re afraid of the net!
Why can’t a fish every play volleyball? They are afraid of the net.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
It’s not. Numbers aren’t sentient and are therefore incapable of feeling fear.