Retired

What did the retired pirate say when he went to the beach?
Long time no sea.
The Art of Discretion
The Art of Discretion Six retired Floridians play high stakes poker in the condo clubhouse. A member of the group, Meiers, loses $5,000 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five finish playing the hand standing up. Finkelstein looks around and asks, "So, who's gonna' tell his wife?" They cut the cards, and Goldberg "wins" the duty. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, not to make a bad situation any worse. "Discreet? I'm the most discreet person you'll ever meet. Discretion is my middle name," he says. Leave it to me." Goldberg goes over to the Meiers' apartment and knocks on the door. Mrs. Meiers wife answers and asks what he wants. Goldberg declares, "Your husband just lost $5,000 playing poker, and is afraid to come home." "Tell him to drop dead!" says the wife. "Will do," he says.