“What we’re really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?” — Erma Bombeck
“Cut my pie into four pieces, I don’t think I could eat eight.” — Yogi Berra
“Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother’s tasted better the day before.”—Rita Rudner
"The Thankstini: A fun and delicious new novelty drink I invented. Cranberry juice, potato vodka, and a bouillon cube. Tastes just like a turkey dinner." -Barney Stinson, How I Met Your Mother
“I can’t cook a Thanksgiving dinner. All I can make is cold cereal and maybe toast.” —Charlie Brown
“Thanksgiving: Bringing out the best in family dysfunction since 1863.” -Unknown
“You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out.” —Jay Leno
“It wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without a little emotional scarring.” — Timothy Burke, “Friends”
“I’m looking forward to seeing pie this Thanksgiving more than members of my own family.” —Damien Fahey
“Thanksgiving is a lot like Christmas, except you don’t get any presents for holding in your familial rage.” -Unknown