Shoot Jokes

What's the difference between a sniper with Parkinson's Disease and a constipated owl?
One can shoot but can't hit...
What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it? Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all!
If you were a puck, I'd never shoot. Because I would always miss you.
How do you shoot a three-headed ghoul?
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Can You Please Shoot Me Some More? Dave the ranch hand had just finished up his work for the evening and is about to get into his car when a man dressed in black appears from the bushes with a gun in his hand. "Give me everything you've got!" he screeches at Dave. So Dave hands over his money and his wallet, but as the man is about to leave Dave stops him. "Say..." he says to the robber. "Could you shoot a few bullets in my hat to make it look to my wife like I was truly afraid for my life? She'd think I spent it on booze and gambling otherwise." The robber had a wife too so he agreed and shot a few holes in Dave's hat. Dave then asked, "Please shoot a few bullets in the coat while you're at it, I want to look like I fought you and not like a coward." The criminal sighed and shot the coat. Then Dave said: "Can you please shoot-" "please, no more, I'm out of bullets!" said the mugger tiredly. "That's what I wanted to hear." Smiled Dave unpleasantly. "Now give me back the wallet and some more money for the hat and coat you destroyed before I beat you black and blue!"
Why are street thugs so good at basketball?
Because they know how to shoot, steal, and run.
Basketball players make good husbands. They never shoot their wives.
Twinkle Twinkle little star,
take me to some dreams afar.
Help me, help me get some sleep.
Before I have to shoot a sheep!
What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it? Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.
The photographer mummy was done with his shoot. So he told his crew to wrap it up.
How is a man like a gun?
Keep one around long enough, and you’ll definitely want to shoot him.
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
"How do you shoot a killer bee?" "With a bee bee gun."
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
Why shouldn't you shoot pool using a pickle?
Because you'll find the cue cumbersome.
How does a snake shoot something?
With a boa and arrow.
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