Basketball Jokes

What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
Matthew said, "You are so tall that you are a basketball hoop!" I replied, "Actually, I get to be on a basketball court."
Shaun was constantly asked if he played basketball. He now answers back by saying, "Hey, do you play minigolf?"
Jack was in the playground when one of his friends asked, "Yo mama so tall did she play basketball?" He replied, "Your mom is so short. Did she scrub floors?"
What do you call a pumpkin that can slam dunk a basketball?
Michael Gourdan.
Q: Which basketball players eat fruits?
A: The ones who like to cherry pick.
I am so dedicated to basketball, but I promise you I will bring that dedication to our relationship.
If you were a basketball, I'd never pass because I want to keep you all to myself.
I'm a good basketball handler, what about you?
Tigers are bad at basketball because they have only four feet.
Why don’t dolphins play basketball?
Because they’re afraid of the net!
What does the visual system use to play basketball?
Eyeballs.
Working at The Circus So, Alex sees an ad in the newspaper that says “Circus Looking for New Talents”. Alex says to himself, “Eh, what the heck. I’m pretty talented.” and calls the circus. A lady answers him. “Hello,” she says. “Hi, is this the circus?” “Yes.” “I’ve heard you’re hiring.” “You’ve heard correctly, sir. What is your name?” “Alex.” “Alright then, Alex, what makes you think you can join the circus?” “Well, I have several talents... for example, I can shoot a three-pointer in basketball, like five times in a row.” “O... Okay... That’s quite impressive, sir, but it’s not really not what we’re looking for. I think maybe you should call the NB...” “No, no, wait! I... I can hula hoop for like 30 seconds straight!” “Sir, I really don’t think you understand what the concept of a cir...” “No, please, I... I... I can jump on one leg while saying the alphabet backwards!” “...” “...” “Goodbye, sir.” She hangs up the phone. Alex sits there for a few seconds before he realizes he forgot something. “Oh darn, I forgot to tell her I’m a horse.”
I’ve never lost a game of football basketball or volleyball!
Though I’ve never played a game either.
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