What kind of cat always crosses the road?
A jaguar.
Why didn’t the flamingo cross the road?
Because he’s not a chicken.
Why did the chicken use a bridge to cross the road?
He wanted to take the high way.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
Why did the lion cross the road?
He was bored of lion around.
Why did the czar cross the road?
To get to his car.
Why did the potato run across the road?
So it wouldn’t get mashed.
Why did the clock cross the road?
It couldn’t wait.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.
Why did the spy cross the road?
Because he was never on your side.
Why did the bunny cross the road?
To go to the hare dresser.
Why did the corn cross the road?
Because it was being stalked.
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It was bored of just standing there.
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?
She was afraid someone would Caesar.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to its school.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get out of the barking lot.
Why did the clown cross the road?
To retrieve his rubber chicken.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To bock traffic.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day, and it wanted people to think it was a chicken!
A Duck is about to cross the road. A chicken runs out to stop him screaming "Don't do it, man - you'll never hear the end of it!"
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
It was picking up the chicken’s feathers.
Why did the fish cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Why did the rabbit cross the road?
It had to get from hare to there.
What did the buffalo say when his son crossed the road?
-Bison.
Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?
To stretch her legs.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
Why did the chicken run across the road?
To get to the other side faster.
Why did the monster truck drive on the sidewalk?
Because he didn’t want to run over the chicken!
How long did it take Lancelot to cross the road?
All knight.
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
Why did the baby chick cross the road?
It was a take-your-child-to-work day.
How did the sheep cross the road?
It ram across.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why did the Communist wait till the last minute to cross the road?
He was Stalin.
What do you call a chicken crossing the road?
Poultry in motion.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It was either chasing an egg or being chased by an egg, I’m not sure which came first.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the chicken cross the busy road?
It was feeling clucky.
Why did the fox cross the road?
She was chasing the chicken.
Why didn’t the bicycle cross the road?
Because it was two tired!
Why did the horse dance while crossing the road?
He was horsing around.
Why did the wolf take so long to cross the road?
It was pretending to be a snail.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
How many birds can cross the road?
Toucan.
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