Why did my wife cross the road?
To go back to the same shoe shop we went to three hours ago.
What kind of cat always crosses the road?
A jaguar.
Why did the coyote cross the road?
It was chasing the road runner.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He had something to cock-a-doodle dooo!
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
How many birds can cross the road?
Toucan.
How did the sheep cross the road?
It ram across.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
Why did the farmer cross the road?
To get his chicken back.
How do animals know when to cross the road?
The chameleon changes from red to green.
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
The chicken couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Why did the chicken cross the busy road?
It was feeling clucky.
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baa-baa shop for a haircut.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
What did the buffalo say when his son crossed the road?
-Bison.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
Why did the wolf take so long to cross the road?
It was pretending to be a snail.
Why did Chicken Little cross the road?
To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling.
Why didn’t the chicken cross the road?
Because there was a KFC on the other side.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To bock traffic.
Why did the potato run across the road?
So it wouldn’t get mashed.
How did the sushi cross the road?
It was rolling.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
I don’t know, why?
I don’t know — I asked you!
How long did it take Lancelot to cross the road?
All knight.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get out of the barking lot.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because it was a zebra crossing.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It was bored of just standing there.
Why did the chicken stop crossing the road?
It got tired of everyone making so many jokes.
Why did the cat cross the road?
Because her owner told her not to do it.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because it thought it was a chicken.
Why did the raccoon cross the road?
He saw you put out the garbage.
What do you call a chicken crossing the road?
Poultry in motion.
How did the egg cross the road?
It scrambled across!
Why did the lion cross the road?
He was bored of lion around.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to its school.
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the baby chick cross the road?
It was a take-your-child-to-work day.
Why did the chicken use a bridge to cross the road?
He wanted to take the high way.
Why did the bunny cross the road?
To go to the hare dresser.
Why is everyone mad when the pig crosses the road?
Because he’s a road hog.
Why did the chicken family cross the road?
They thought it was an egg-cellent idea.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day, and it wanted people to think it was a chicken!
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn’t — the road moved back underneath him.
Why did the clock cross the road?
It couldn’t wait.