Why is everyone mad when the pig crosses the road?
Because he’s a road hog.
Why couldn't the mathematician cross the road?
Because he kept trying to half the distance.
Why did the lion cross the road?
He was bored of lion around.
Why did the dragon cross the road?
He was dragged on by his mum.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to its school.
Why did the toddler cross the road?
He wanted to pet the chicken.
Why did the clown cross the road?
To retrieve his rubber chicken.
Why did the monkey cross the road?
Because the chicken retired.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
Why did the snail take so long to cross the road?
It was feeling sluggish.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get out of the barking lot.
Why did the Communist wait till the last minute to cross the road?
He was Stalin.
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
A Duck is about to cross the road. A chicken runs out to stop him screaming "Don't do it, man - you'll never hear the end of it!"
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
How do animals know when to cross the road?
The chameleon changes from red to green.
Why did the spy cross the road?
Because he was never on your side.
Why did the rabbit cross the road?
It had to get from hare to there.
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Why didn’t the flamingo cross the road?
Because he’s not a chicken.
Why did the wolf take so long to cross the road?
It was pretending to be a snail.
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn’t — the road moved back underneath him.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He had something to cock-a-doodle dooo!
Why did the engineer cross the road?
Because he looked in the files, and that’s what they did last time.
Why did the farmer cross the road?
To get his chicken back.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day, and it wanted people to think it was a chicken!
Why did the clock cross the road?
It couldn’t wait.
Why did the doctor cross the road?
Hard to say really. Could be any number of reasons.
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because it thought it was a chicken.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the coyote cross the road?
It was chasing the road runner.
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why did the cow cross the road?
So he could go to the MOO-vies.
Why does the tin keep crossing the road?
Because it can.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
The chicken couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Why did the potato run across the road?
So it wouldn’t get mashed.
Why did the cat cross the road?
Because her owner told her not to do it.
Why did the fox cross the road?
She was chasing the chicken.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side!
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Why didn’t the bicycle cross the road?
Because it was two tired!
Why did the corn cross the road?
Because it was being stalked.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
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