What kind of cat always crosses the road?
A jaguar.
Why does the tin keep crossing the road?
Because it can.
How do animals know when to cross the road?
The chameleon changes from red to green.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to its school.
Why did the horse dance while crossing the road?
He was horsing around.
How did the sushi cross the road?
It was rolling.
Why did the rabbit cross the road?
It had to get from hare to there.
Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baa-baa shop for a haircut.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day, and it wanted people to think it was a chicken!
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the Communist wait till the last minute to cross the road?
He was Stalin.
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
Why did the clock cross the road?
It couldn’t wait.
Why did the czar cross the road?
To get to his car.
Why did the dragon cross the road?
He was dragged on by his mum.
Why did the corn cross the road?
Because it was being stalked.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the cow cross the road?
So he could go to the MOO-vies.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He had something to cock-a-doodle dooo!
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn’t — the road moved back underneath him.
Why did the fish cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What did the buffalo say when his son crossed the road?
-Bison.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
Why did the farmer cross the road?
To get his chicken back.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
A Duck is about to cross the road. A chicken runs out to stop him screaming "Don't do it, man - you'll never hear the end of it!"
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Why didn’t the bicycle cross the road?
Because it was two tired!
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because it was a zebra crossing.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
It was picking up the chicken’s feathers.
Why did the lion cross the road?
He was bored of lion around.
Why did the engineer cross the road?
Because he looked in the files, and that’s what they did last time.
Why did the queen cross the road?
To get to coronation street.
How did the sheep cross the road?
It ram across.
Why did the snail take so long to cross the road?
It was feeling sluggish.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get out of the barking lot.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
The chicken couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Why did the doctor cross the road?
Hard to say really. Could be any number of reasons.
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
How long did it take Lancelot to cross the road?
All knight.
Why did the coyote cross the road?
It was chasing the road runner.
Why did the toddler cross the road?
He wanted to pet the chicken.
Why did the bunny cross the road?
To go to the hare dresser.
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