Why did the Communist wait till the last minute to cross the road?
He was Stalin.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the doctor cross the road?
Hard to say really. Could be any number of reasons.
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
Why did the fox cross the road?
She was chasing the chicken.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to its school.
Why did the coyote cross the road?
It was chasing the road runner.
Why did the monkey cross the road?
Because the chicken retired.
Why did the rabbit cross the road?
It had to get from hare to there.
How did the sheep cross the road?
It ram across.
Why does the tin keep crossing the road?
Because it can.
Why did the bunny cross the road?
To go to the hare dresser.
Why did the lion cross the road?
He was bored of lion around.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Why did the queen cross the road?
To get to coronation street.
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baa-baa shop for a haircut.
Why did the raccoon cross the road?
He saw you put out the garbage.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He had something to cock-a-doodle dooo!
Why did the nose cross the road?
Because he was tired of getting picked on.
What kind of cat always crosses the road?
A jaguar.
Why did the monster truck drive on the sidewalk?
Because he didn’t want to run over the chicken!
Why did the clock cross the road?
It couldn’t wait.
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
How long did it take Lancelot to cross the road?
All knight.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
It was picking up the chicken’s feathers.
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
Why did the snail take so long to cross the road?
It was feeling sluggish.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day, and it wanted people to think it was a chicken!
Why did the potato run across the road?
So it wouldn’t get mashed.
Why did the czar cross the road?
To get to his car.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
How did the sushi cross the road?
It was rolling.
Why is everyone mad when the pig crosses the road?
Because he’s a road hog.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
Why did the cat cross the road?
Because her owner told her not to do it.
Why didn’t the flamingo cross the road?
Because he’s not a chicken.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side!
Why did the spy cross the road?
Because he was never on your side.
Why did the cow cross the road?
So he could go to the MOO-vies.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because it thought it was a chicken.
Why didn’t the bicycle cross the road?
Because it was two tired!
Why did the elephant cross the road?
The chicken couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Why couldn't the mathematician cross the road?
Because he kept trying to half the distance.
Why did my wife cross the road?
To go back to the same shoe shop we went to three hours ago.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
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