Why did the queen cross the road?
To get to coronation street.
Why did the engineer cross the road?
Because he looked in the files, and that’s what they did last time.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Why did the farmer cross the road?
To get his chicken back.
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side!
A Duck is about to cross the road. A chicken runs out to stop him screaming "Don't do it, man - you'll never hear the end of it!"
Why did the dragon cross the road?
He was dragged on by his mum.
Why did the rabbit cross the road?
It had to get from hare to there.
Why did the cow cross the road?
So he could go to the MOO-vies.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
Why did the snail take so long to cross the road?
It was feeling sluggish.
Why did my wife cross the road?
To go back to the same shoe shop we went to three hours ago.
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn’t — the road moved back underneath him.
How many birds can cross the road?
Toucan.
How long did it take Lancelot to cross the road?
All knight.
Why did the monster truck drive on the sidewalk?
Because he didn’t want to run over the chicken!
Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baa-baa shop for a haircut.
Why did the spy cross the road?
Because he was never on your side.
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the cat cross the road?
Because her owner told her not to do it.
Why did the fox cross the road?
She was chasing the chicken.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
How do animals know when to cross the road?
The chameleon changes from red to green.
Why is everyone mad when the pig crosses the road?
Because he’s a road hog.
Why did the wolf take so long to cross the road?
It was pretending to be a snail.
Why did the horse dance while crossing the road?
He was horsing around.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
Why couldn't the mathematician cross the road?
Because he kept trying to half the distance.
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Why did the Communist wait till the last minute to cross the road?
He was Stalin.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get out of the barking lot.