Race

I'm Going to Host a Boat Race.
The winner will get pasta. It will be called the Penne Regatta.
How do you organise a welcome party for an alien race?
You planet.
Why did the skier from Helsinki dominate the downhill slalom competition?
He led the race from start to Finnish.
Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?
It ended in a tie.
Did you hear about the two silkworms that were in a race? They wound up in a tie.
What do you call a hot dog race? Wiener takes all.
What do you call a hot dog race? Wiener takes all.
Did you hear about the salad race the other day?
The Lettuce was ahead, but the Tomato was ketchoping up...
There was an exotic pet race to take place.

Adam brought an iguana. "Hes big and fast so hes sure to win!"
Daniel brought a komodo dragon. "He can go really fast when theres a treat for him at the end!"
John brought a leopard gecko. "Hes small but does his best!"

The bets were placed, the race took place and Johns leopard gecko won. When asked after the race how they felt his competitors had only one thing to say:

"Sure no surprises there. We knew he was going to win from the gecko."
With my IQ and your body we could begin a race of genetic superchildren to conquer the earth.
There was an exotic pet race to take place.

Adam brought an iguana. "Hes big and fast so hes sure to win!"
Daniel brought a komodo dragon. "He can go really fast when theres a treat for him at the end!"
John brought a leopard gecko. "Hes small but does his best!"

The bets were placed, the race took place and Johns leopard gecko won. When asked after the race how they felt his competitors had only one thing to say:

"Sure no surprises there. We knew he was going to win from the gecko."
What do you call two bandits in a race on the ocean.
Piracy.
No body has ever won a skeleton race.
"No body won the skeleton race."
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
An Experiment Turned Race
An Experiment Turned Race There was a young fellow who was quite inventive and was always trying out new things. One day he thought he'd see just how fast a bicycle could go before it became uncontrollable. He asked his friend, who owned an old Chevelle if he could tie his bike to the bumper of his car to test his theory. His friend said, "Sure." So the young man tied his bike to the back of the car and said to his friend: "I'll ring my bike bell once if I want you to go faster, twice if I want you to maintain speed, and repeatedly if I want you to slow down." With that, off they went. Things were going pretty well, with the car driver slowly speeding up to well over 60 mph. The young fellow on the bike was handling the speed just fine. But, all of sudden, an orange Camaro came up beside them and before you knew it, the fellow driving the Chevelle forgot all about the fellow on the bike and took to drag racing the Chevelle. A little further down the road sat Officer John in his police cruiser, radar gun at the ready. He heard the two cars before his radar flashed 105 mph He called into headquarters on his radio: "Hey, you guys aren't going to believe this, but there's a Camaro and a Chevelle racing out here on Highway 3, and there's a guy on a bike ringing his bell and waving his arms trying to pass them!"