Lazy

What do you call a lazy goat?
Billy Idle.
25 Years For Being Lazy
25 Years For Being Lazy In a prison in China, prisoners are discussing who's in for what and for how long. "Hey, Zhang- what are you in for?" Zhang: "Strangled my wife's lover to death. Got 15 years. How about you, Wei?" Wei: "I got 10 years for robbery and stabbing. What about you, Wang?" Wang: "I got 5 years for attempted rape. What about you, Liu?" Liu: "25 years for being lazy." All the other prisoners: "WHAT?! HOW?" Liu sighs. "Well, my neighbor and I were playing Go and after few shots of wine, started telling jokes about Jinping and the government. After my neighbor left, I thought to myself: "I should go to the government and report him". But it was late and I was tired, so I decided to go just wait until the morning and went to sleep.  My neighbor, on the other hand, wasn't as lazy..."
How do you know when your dog is lazy?
When it chases parked cars.
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye
Turns out she was seeing someone else.
If I had to describe myself in 3 words?
Lazy.
What do you call a lazy crayfish?
A slobster.
What do you call a goat that’s lazy?
Billy Idle.
Did you hear about the lazy flower who finally got his act together?
He just needed a kick in the bud.
Plain English
Plain English The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said: "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me." "Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy." "Okay," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."