Breaking Jokes

I inshtalled my shelf wrong and it fell on top of me, breaking my jaw. Now I shound weird.
I guesh I only have myshelf to blame.
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
What’s the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese person?
You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message.
What’s the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese person?
You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message.
What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
You deserve butter.
They fired the loaf of bread from her job. They say that she kept breaking down and would rye on the job.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
While breaking up with Princess Peach, Mario said "You are so peachy, I can't take it anymore".
Someone asked me to sing a line from "Don't go breaking my heart"
I couldn't if I tried.
This soldier, Titius, liked to kick a soccer ball around at night and was suspected of breaking some important statues. When his friends asked why he hadn't showed up for his platoon's morning workout, Terentius Vespa quipped,
"Oh, it's okay - he said he broke an arm."
What leaves a bigger hole in your heart than breaking up with your girlfriend?
A bullet.
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
I'm arresting you for breaking the 8th amendment because you...are excessively fine!
Breaking a leg during an audition ensures you're in the cast.
My blender is a bit forgetfull. It keep breaking the ice with me.
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