Remember Jokes

"If you want to pass this point alive, you must answer my riddle: What goes on four legs in the morning, two legs at noon and on three legs in the evening?" the Sphinx asked.
Oedipus pondered for a moment, "Probably one of those new Pokemones," he finally replied. "There is like 600 of them.
"Fair enough man," spoke the Sphinx. "I can't reasonably expect you to remember all their names. You may pass."
"The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened. - Mark Twain
"The important thing to remember is that I’m probably going to forget." - Unknown
“By the time you’re 80 years old you’ve learned everything. You only have to remember it.” - George Burns
"As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two." - Sir Norman Wisdom
“By the time you’re 80 years old you’ve learned everything. You only have to remember it.” —George Burns
“We’ve been friends for so long, I can’t remember which one of us is the bad influence.”
— Unknown
“We are best friends. Always remember that if you fall, I will pick you up… after I finish laughing.”
— Unknown
If you are ever babysitting a cherry, remember that their favorite cartoon is Tom And Cherry.
I always tend to forget the french word for strawberry sometimes. But, then I eventually remember the fraise.
The Old Switcheroo...
The Old Switcheroo... George came home from University in tears. "Mom, am I adopted?" "No of course not!", replied his mother. "Why would you think such a thing?" George showed her his genealogy DNA test results. No match for any of his relatives, and strong matches for a family who lived the other side of the city. Perturbed, his mother called her husband. "Honey, George has done a DNA test, and... and... I don't know how to say this... he may not be our son." "Well, obviously!" he replied. "What do you mean?" she asked. "It was your idea in the first place" her husband said. "You remember, that first night in hospital when the baby did nothing but scream and cry and scream and cry. On and on. And you asked me to change him." "I picked a good one I reckon. Ever so proud of George."
Hi. Do you remember me? Oh, that’s right—we’ve only met in my dreams.
How will the other onions remember the onion that died? It will be forever minced!
I always remember to eat my soup with a spoon.
It’s un-fork-edible.
"I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt."
“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart.”
― Erma Bombeck
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