Followed

If the whole world smoked a joint at the same time, There would be world peace for at least two hours. Followed by a global food shortage.
I followed my heart to you.
What did the corn say when it was being followed?
“I’m being stalked!”
The Good Samaritan
The Good Samaritan I saw a woman drop her purse in the high street this morning, so I quickly followed her. As I was just about to tap her on the shoulder she started running for a bus. So I ran after her shouting, “You dropped your purse! You dropped your purse!” She didn’t hear me and proceeded to get onto the bus, so I got on the bus too. As I walked to the back of the bus I breathlessly said, “You floor your purse on the floor outside outside McDonald’s." "Thank you so much!" She exclaimed. "Where is it?" "I just told you, on the floor outside McDonald’s."
"Hey baby, are you being followed? Because I've been seeing people behind your back."
How did the cardiologist figure out what she wanted to do with her life?
She just followed her heart.
There was a young lady of Kent.
Whose nose was most awfully bent.
She followed her nose,
One day, I suppose,
And no one knows which way she went.
My coworkers brought me a bunch of cards to celebrate my birthday
Each one gave me one with a single word printed on it. The first said "extravagant", while the next one said "surplus". These were followed by cards that said "abundance", "excess", and "overflowing". Before I read any more I had to stop because I was overcome with emotion. It was all too much.
There was a young lady named Rose,
Who had a large wart on her nose.
When she had it removed,
Her appearance improved,
But her glasses slipped down to her toes.
She followed her nose,
One day, I suppose,
And no one knows which way she went.