Tonight my wife was making dinner and she was using some fresh peas. She dropped some on the floor. My 4 year old said “mummy, you’ve pee’d on the floor”
“You dropped your kid off a changing table? Stuff just happens, okay? Last week, my kid ate a cigarette. I caught him playing in the dryer yesterday. I picked up the wrong baby from daycare. I found my baby swimming in the toilet. No judging.”
I dropped a ball in your lap It's time to play I just put a ball in your lap So it's time to play See that ball I placed in your lap? That means it's time to play You can have your emergency appendectomy Any other day But I dropped a ball in your lap And now it's time to play
I saw a woman drop her purse in the high street this morning, so I quickly followed her. As I was just about to tap her on the shoulder she started running for a bus.
So I ran after her shouting, “You dropped your purse! You dropped your purse!”
She didn’t hear me and proceeded to get onto the bus, so I got on the bus too. As I walked to the back of the bus I breathlessly said, “You floor your purse on the floor outside McDonald’s."
"Thank you so much!" She exclaimed. "Where is it?"
"I just told you, on the floor outside McDonald’s."
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