Discovered Jokes

My grandfather recently passed, and I discovered in his journal that he has an immense hatred for sloths, pandas, and koala bears. Looking back, it was obvious.
He was always going on about those darn tree-huggers.
When many knights were being killed by guns and bombs, the medieval scientist discovered a weapon that would destroy all their enemies. It was known as the knightrogen bomb!
Whoever discovered calculus sounded a bit derivative.
The nurse called me and said, “Under ‘medical history’, we were hoping for something specific to you.”
You wrote down “Fleming discovered penicillin in 1928.”
Historians have discovered a new Greek God who didn’t excel at anything.
His name was mediocretese.
Scientists have discovered what is believed to be the world's largest bed sheet.
More on this story, as it unfolds.
“Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible.”
Doug Larson
Scientists have just discovered a fossilized Dinosaur fart...
They say it’s a blast from the past!
When the Vikings discovered America, what did they name it?
Norse America.
“As I have gotten older and wiser I discovered that there are six things that I really loved about my job. Pay day, lunch time, quitting time, vacation time, holidays, and of course retirement.” — Tom Goins
What did the gardeners say when he discovered nasty weeds in his garden?
I have spotted spurge!
Vasco de Balboa told the Queen of Spain, “I discovered a large body of water on my journey.”
She said, “Could you be a little more pacific?”
It wasn't til I studied Spanish as an adult that learned Spain discovered Canada.
As our teacher explained it, the first maps said "Acá, nada."
Which cat discovered America? Christofurry Columbus.
Archeologists discovered an ancient Egyptian tomb that was dedicated solely to women.
At least that's what they concluded as it was full of Mummys.
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