There was a young lady from the Azores Whose box was all covered with sores And the dogs in the street Wouldn’t bark at the meat that hung in festoons from her drawers.
There once was a man from leeds who ate a packet of seeds within the hour his dick was a flour and his balls were all covered in weeds.
There once was a guy named Swartz, whose dick was covered with warts, but the girls would play, with his dick anyway, 'cause good ol' Swartz came in quarts!
There was a young man from Peru, who fell asleep in his canoe, while dreaming of Venus, he played with his penis, and woke up covered in goo.
The Unending Accident
George walks up to Terry bruised. battered and covered in blood...
Terry asks what the hell happened to him. He says "I'm just walking along, minding my own business and this horse comes out of nowhere and knocks me down."
"That explains it, let me call you an ambulance." Says Terry.
George says, "Hold on I haven't finished yet, so I get up, dust myself down and wouldn't you know it? I get knocked down by a car."
"Oh my god, it's a miracle you're still alive, I'll call an ambulance." Says Terry.
George says, "Hold on, I still haven't finished, I get up dust myself down again, I've now got a few cuts and bruises. I catch my breath and I get knocked down by an ambulance." Terry says. "That's it, I'm calling the emergency services."
George says "Wait, I still haven't finished, somehow I survived. I get up, I'm feeling groggy, but then I get hit by a fire truck. I get up swaying side to side. Then a helicopter crashes into me."
Terry say: "it's a miracle that you're still alive, so what happened then?"
"The carnie operator kicked me off the carousel!"