Why did the tortilla chip start dancing?
Because they put on the salsa.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish.
My neighbors are listening to great music. Whether they like it or not!
What’s a pirate’s favorite instrument?
The guit-arrr!
What do you get when you put a radio in the fridge?
Cool music.
Why did the fish make such a good musician?
He knew his scales.
What kind of music did the pilgrims listen to?
Plymouth Rock!
What’s the slang term for a harpsichord?
A Baroque man’s piano.
Accordion to one study, people don’t notice when you replace any given word with the name of a musical instrument, but I don’t believe that tuba true.
What do you get if you cross a sweet potato and a jazz musician?
A yam session.
Why can’t skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
Who’s there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
Wow! I didn’t know you could yodel!
What do you call a guitar player that only knows two chords?
A music critic.
What is a cat’s favorite song?
“Three Blind Mice.”
What is Beethoven’s favorite fruit?
Ba-na-na-naaaaa.
I wrote a song about a tortilla chip.
Actually, it's more like a wrap.
What song do tornados like?
“The Twist.”
There are so many jokes about a certain composer…
I could make you a Liszt.
What’s the definition of perfect pitch?
When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.
What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument?
A moo-sician.
What did they say about the tone-deaf boy?
He has Van Gogh's ear for music.
A sign at a music shop: “Gone Chopin. Bach in a minuet.”
Why did the music teacher go up the ladder during music class?
To reach the high notes.
Why was music coming from the printer?
The paper was jamming.
What do a sword and a piano have in common?
They can both B sharp.
What do you say to the musician playing the triangle in the orchestra?
Thank you for every ting.
A young child says to his mother, "Mom, when I grow up I'd like to be a musician." She replies, "Well honey, you know you can't do both."
Why couldn’t the string quartet find their composer?
He was Haydn.
What has a neck but no head?
A bass.
How do you get a trombonist off your doorstep?
Pay them for the pizza.
What's the difference between a banjo and an onion?
Nobody cries when you chop up a banjo.
Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?
He was playing by ear.
How do you fix a broken brass instrument?
With a tuba glue.