It’s so hot that my kite crashed and burned.
It's so hot, I saw a guy with a sign that said, "Will work for shade."
It’s so hot the cows are producing evaporated milk.
It’s so hot that the oven got jealous.
It’s so hot that you can poach eggs in a pool.
It’s so hot the trees are whistling for the dogs.
It's so hot that I went to hell just to cool off.
It's so hot out that I cleaned my fridge just so I could hang out in my fridge for a while.
It's so hot that all the water buffalo at the zoo evaporated.
It’s so hot you can pull a leaf off a tree and iron with it.
It’s so hot the Statue of Liberty was asked to lower her arm.
It’s so hot my campfire lit itself.
It’s so hot my thermometer goes up to “Are you kidding me?”
It’s so hot I’m sweating like a politician on election day.
It’s so hot the best parking place is determined by the shade instead of the distance.
It’s so hot the birds are using oven mitts to pull worms out of the ground.
It’s so hot that the clams were already steamed when I dug them up.
It’s so hot the frozen pizza I bought at the grocery store was ready to eat by the time I got home.
It’s so hot I started putting ice cubes in my waterbed.
It’s so hot that you can’t make a chili dog.
It’s so hot I got condensation on my backside from the water in the toilet bowl.
It’s so hot outside I just saw two hobbits throw a ring off my roof.
It was so hot that my gold jewelry melted.
It’s so hot even my wife’s heart is melting.
It’s so hot that I’m using Celsius instead of Fahrenheit just to have a lower number.
It’s so hot I wish had got the cloth seats instead of the leather ones.
It’s so hot you can wash and dry your clothes at the same time.
It’s so hot that Tabasco sauce tastes mild.
It's so hot outside the ice cream man just change the sign on the side of his truck to "cream."
It’s so hot that corn on the stalks starts popping.
It’s so hot chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
It’s so hot your clothes iron themselves.
It’s so hot all chocolate is hot chocolate.
It’s so hot granny broke wind just to have a little breeze.
It’s so hot Adam and Eve traded their fig leaves for ice cubes.
It’s so hot I saw a chicken lay an omelet.
It’s so hot everyone is wearing sweat pants.
It’s so hot even the artificial flowers are dying.
It's so hot I saw an Amish guy buy an air conditioner.
It’s so hot polar bears are wearing sunscreen.
It's so hot that you can fry an egg on the sidewalk!
It was so hot that the soles of my shoes melted.
It was so hot that I poured boiling water on myself to cool down.
It’s so hot they installed a fan in the debt ceiling.
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