It’s so cold that bed bugs promised not to bite you as long as they can snuggle in your pajamas.
It was so cold that I saw a Greyhound bus and the dog was riding on the inside.
It’s so cold I tried to take out the garbage, but it refused to go.
It’s so cold that even the snowmen are wearing sweaters!
It's so cold that you have to open the fridge to heat the house.
It’s so cold that when we baked the frozen pizza in the oven for 25 minutes, it was still frozen.
It’s so cold we were afraid to spit because it can ricochet.
It was so cold firemen couldn’t get the people out of the burning building because it was warm.
It's so cold that polar bears wear jackets.
It’s so cold the aquarium didn’t need to use glass. On the downside, the fish were motionless.
It’s so cold a glacier was seen heading slowly down the main street of our town.
It’s so cold the police told a robber to freeze, and he really did.
It’s so cold Levi Strauss started making electric jeans.
It’s so cold that when I dialed the emergency number, there was a recording that said to call back in spring.
It's so cold that you have to break the smoke off your chimney.
It’s so cold that Jack Frost changed his name to Jack Froze.
It’s so cold we had to punch a hole in the air just to get outside.
It's so cold that our words froze in midair — we had to put them in a frying pan to thaw them so we could hear what we were talking about.
It’s so cold my mail shattered when I tried to open it.
It's so cold that people started chipping their teeth on soup!
It’s so cold the rats in the alley were bribing the cats for a snuggle.
It’s so cold teenagers began to worry about getting goosebumps rather than acne.
It’s so cold that Grandpa’s teeth are chattering – in the glass!
It’s so cold mum used a saw to serve us milk.
It’s so cold cops are tasering themselves.
It’s so cold ice cubes are coming out of my tap.
It’s so cold we had to salt the hallway.
It’s so cold my shadow ended up freezing on the sidewalk.
It’s so cold our table cutlery now includes a saw.