In the Beginning there was nothing … then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.
One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a practical joke.
That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn’t turn the lights on,
he turns the dark off.
Chuck Norris breathes air … five times a day.
What kind of House does Chuck Norris live in?
A Round House.
Chuck Norris can beat his reflection at rock paper scissors.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
Chuck Norris has a gun for breakfast at ate a glock every morning.
Chuck Norris caught COVID.
But then he felt bad, so he let it go.
On the 7th day, God rested … and Chuck Norris took over.
Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
Chuck Norris doesn't ever call the wrong number. You just answer the wrong phone.
Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at a Burger King. He got it.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are now known as giraffes.
If Chuck Norris were to travel to an alternate dimension in which there was another Chuck Norris and they both fought, they would both win.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
Chuck Norris tells Simon what to do.
The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Chuck Norris’s fist.
Chuck Norris was bitten by the worlds most venemous snake.
After hours of excruciating pain and misery, the snake died.
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