Champions are the breakfast of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will change the spelling.
The flu gets a Chuck Norris shot every year.
Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.
Before he forgot to bring a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Chuck Norris can clap with one hand.
In Pamplona, Spain, the people may be running from the bulls, but the bulls are running from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can have both feet on the ground and kick butt at the same time
Chuck Norris can speak braille.
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
When Chuck Norris goes scuba diving
He gives the water the bends.
Chuck Norris won a 10 minute race after giving his competitors a 10 minute head start.
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's beef.
Chuck Norris’ calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, because no one fools Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can speak French... In Russian.
Chuck Norris is what Willis was talkin about.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to flush the toilet. He simply goes "Boo!" and anything in the bowl promptly rushes away.
Chuck Norris' keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key, because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
A bulletproof vest wears Chuck Norris for protection.
Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.
Chuck Norris changed a lightbulb...
With one hand he held the bulb, with the other he turned the house.
Chuck Norris has died aged 79.
But Death is too scared to let him know.
Chuck Norris caught COVID.
But then he felt bad, so he let it go.
Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, he chews bees.
Chuck Norris once shot an enemy plane down with his finger, by yelling, “Bang!”
Chuck Norris tells Simon what to do.
The real reason Hitler killed himself is because he found out that Chuck Norris is Jewish.
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
On the 7th day, God rested … and Chuck Norris took over.
Chuck Norris drinks napalm to fight his heartburn.
Earlier today I was wondering if it was possible to abort Chuck Norris..
..then I realized he was aborted.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can cut a knife with butter.
When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
Chuck Norris used to beat up his shadow because it was following too close. It now stands 15 feet behind him.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It didn’t work.
Chuck Norris once bowled a perfect game with a marble.
Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-47.
Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek." He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
What happens when Chuck Norris lifts Thor Hammer?
The hammer explodes because it is not worthy.
Chuck Norris just put up a new sign outside his house...
It says 'Welcome, Spanish Inquisition!'
Chuck Norris fell into a black hole.
The black hole couldn't escape.
How does Chuck Norris sharpen his blades?
By shaving with them.
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