What do you call a 5 foot hobo?
Whatever his name is.
A screwdriver walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Hey, we have a drink named after you!” The Screwdriver responds, “You have a drink named Murray?”
What do you call a joke that isn’t funny? A sentence.
What did the homeless man get for christmas?
Nothing.
What would Kurt Cobain be doing if he was still alive? Clawing at the inside of his casket.
What did Buzz Lightyear say to Woody?
A lot. There were three movies, and a couple short films too.
Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says “I’ll take a glass of H2O.” The second says “I’ll take a glass of H2O too.”
Why can’t Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 million years.
A priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into a bar.
They all get a drink, because bars in America are legally required to serve people of all religions.
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