What time does the library open?" the man on the phone asked.
Annoyed, the librarian composed himself before he answered.
"9 am," came the reply. "And what's the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?"
"Not until 9 am?" the man asked in a disappointed voice.
The librarian began to get angry.
"No, not until 9 am," said the librarian. "Why do you want to get in before 9 am?"
"Who said I wanted to get in?" the man sighed sadly. "I want to get out."
Scroll below for more funny jokes!
Receptionist, You Must Come Quickly (Hilarious Joke)
A receptionist is alerted to the presence of a man outside the window of an old lady who's staying at the hotel. She goes to investigate the problem...
Joke: Dad, I Need Money
A college student writes home to ask for money from his dad. Little did he know that his dad would have a rather curt reply...
Palm Readers Never Cease to Amaze (Hilarious Joke)
A man visits a palm reader that's exhibiting at a street fair. It doesn't take long for her to amaze him with her accuracy...
Joke: Doctor, What Are You Going to Do With My Husband?
A man's penis just starts to grow with no end to the growth in sight. He soon resorts to seeking out a urologist...
This Joke Starts With an Elderly Couple At a Travel Agency
Two elderly people are spotted by a travel agent at his agency's window. He promptly invites them in and discusses sending them on a dream vacation...
This Joke Starts With a Man Sitting Next to a Cute Blonde
Blondes have a reputation for not being the sharpest knives in the drawer, but this man soon finds out that you should never judge a book by its cover...
17 Times Translations Went Completely Off the Rails
These mistakes prove translating isn’t always easy.
6:07
Brilliant! Now THAT'S What I Call Perfect Comic Timing!
Michael Davis's juggling is something out of the ordinary. Be warned, you may find this peformance ridiculously hilarious.
17 Award-Winning Pet Photos That Will Make You Giggle
These hilarious pet photos are guaranteed to make you smile and chuckle!
Funny Bar Ads That Might Make You Thirsty!
When you're a pub landlord, it's always a challenge to get the customers through the door, but these 17 hilarious signs will show you how creative they can be.
HILARIOUS: When T-Shirts Forgot to Use Google Translate
Here are 15 of the most gloriously confused English phrases spotted on Japanese shirts.
These Adorable Yet Funny Snapchats of Dogs Are a Must-See!
These snapchats of dogs are both funny and cute.
16:18
Rodney Dangerfield, The Man of a Million One liners!
Here is a great compilation of some of his best lines and of course - his terrific delivery, Dangerfield style.
Hilarious: When Granny Gets Creative
Meet Kimiko Nishimoto, a little old lady from Japan who is making the world laugh with her insanely hilarious photos!
Hilarious! Men Can Handle Anything Impossible!
Hilarious photos illustrating how men are willing to do just about anything!
These Witty Rejoinders Just Gave Me a Big Grin!
These zingers come from the mischievous mouths of history's most loved celebrities. Prepare to laugh.
6:13
Mr. Bean Can't Even Go to Hospital without Making a Scene!
Mr. Bean has to go to the hospital , but soon realizes that he will have a pretty long wait...
The Most Honest (and Funniest) Dictionary Ever
If you think dictionaries were dry and pedantic, you'd be right. That is, they were, until these cheeky definitions came along.
How a French Artist Turns Street Signs into Humor
These humorous road signs will give you a good laugh.
These Bathrooms Take Humor Seriously (Rude)
These hilarious bathrooms signs are sure to make your trip to the little boy's or girl's room much more enjoyable!
Quirky and Funny Signs Around the World
his wonderful collection will make you laugh out loud as we present you with some of the funniest signs you've ever seen!
Beat the Heat With Some Great Humor!
These 18 funny and empowering pictures will show you how people were trying to fight off this year's massive heatwave all across the globe.
Hilarious – Kids vs. Common Sense: Who Wins?
These photos capture the chaotic energy of childhood.
2:01
Funny Gag: Why is This Animal Daycare FREEZING Dogs?
This may be the world's WORST doggy daycare.
Cats Have An Innate Ability to Be Really Naughty..
If you have a cat, you know that they can be partial to behaving like jerks sometimes. This is especially true in the 19 hilarious photos you're about to see.
4:27
Catch Me If You Can: Brave Monkey Plays with Tigers
This monkey isn't afraid of tigers, and has a great sense of humor
15 Unfortunate Home Renovations That Went SO Disastrously
All it takes is a few seemingly small planning errors to end up with some truly bewildering and bizarre construction calamities
Who Knew Signs Could Be This Hilarious?
These signs are more hilarious than they are meant to be.
Are These the Funniest Business Signs Ever Made?
These hilarious business signs will definitely tickle your funny bone.
Want a Laugh? Try These 14 Witty Lines!
The best jokes and phrases are the ones that completely catch us off guard. Here are 14 very witty and unpredictable jokes and phrases.
These 17 Cakes Went Terribly Wrong and It’s Hilarious!
All 17 of these baking attempts failed miserably, but somehow, it’s absolutely hilarious!
14 English Oddities That Will Make You Laugh!
There are some pretty odd languages in the world, but surely nothing comes close to matching English's absurdities? Take a look at these oddities.
22 Witty Comics to Make You Smile
22 of the funniest New Yorker cartoons that are just clever enough to be funny but not mysteriously so.
The Most Hilarious Photos from the Animal Kingdom!
Take a look at this hilarious collection of animal-failures.
FUNNY: Dad Turns his Kid's Lunch Bags Into Daily Laughs
Meet Dave, better known as “Sandwich Bag Dad,” whose hilarious dad jokes will have you chortling.
25 Warning Signs That Make You Laugh
Many caution signs can be redundant or plain weird. Here are 25 such caution signs that will have you either laughing or scratching you head
Lost in Translation: 15 Laugh-Out-Loud Fails
These are some of the funniest translation and spelling fails people have had the luck to encounter and share with others online!
1:39
When Mrs. Brown Was Just a Naive Little Lady...(Rude!)
Mrs. Brown does her best to cheer up an anxious expectant mother with tales from her first pregnancy.
The Funniest Misspelled Signs You’ll Ever See!
Sometimes you see a sign or notice and you just have to do a double take. These 18 utterly hilarious spelling fails will have you laughing all day long!
These Puppies All Want to Ask God a Little Question
Those of us who believe all have questions for God, and apparently the same is true for puppies. Take a look at the funny questions they would like to ask.
Hilarious! These Kids REALLY Hate Shopping!
While loads of teenagers and adults simply love to shop till they drop, the same can't really be said for most kids, as these hilarious photos prove!
4:54
Classic Comedy: Mrs. Brown and Her Naughty Situation (Rude)
We come back to our favorite foul mouthed lady in this hilarious sketch.This will definitely get you laughing!
Are These the Most Honest Bars of Soap Ever Made?
Does someone you love smell like they might need a brand new bar of soap for their birthday? Then check out this hilarious range of soap bars!
18 Funny Cartoons That Nail the Perfect Punchline
Enjoy this hilarious collection of one-panel comics by New Yorker cartoonist Tommy Siegel
Hilarious: The Anti-Motivation You Didn’t Know You Needed
Tired of motivational quotes? Check out these hilariously cheeky ‘unispirational’ quotes for a good laugh.
1:44
No One Can Make Us Laugh Like the Marx Brothers!
Watch this iconic comedy scene from the movie "Horse Feathers, a Marx Brothers classic.
9:18
Comedy Classics: Laughter & Chaos in the Dentist’s Office
This is perhaps the most hilarious sketch from the The Carol Burnett Show.
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