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koala sewing cabinet Jokes

koala sewing cabinet Jokes and more.
Cheesy Pick Up Lines
You make me wanna go inside your wine cabinet and pull myself out a stiff one.
Australian Pick Up Lines
You are as cute and cuddly as a Koala.
Let’s spend some koala-ty time with each other.
Are you Australian? Cause you meet all my koala-fications!
Food Pick Up Lines
Baby, you remind me of my spice cabinet - cuz you got a fine grind going on.
Kitchen Puns
Anybody who can complete tasks atop the surface of their lower kitchen cabinets is...
counter productive.
Be careful what you say about those plates in the cabinet.
They're stacked.
Love Puns
You met all of my koala-fications
I love spending koala-ty time with you.
Let’s spend some koala-ty time together.
What did the koala say to his girlfriend?
I love you-calpytus.
Bear Puns
What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Koka-Koala.
What is a bear’s favorite soda?
Coca Koala.
Sink Puns
My mother always told me that the best place to mend clothing is in a wash basin
but I don't sink sew.
Frankenstein Puns
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
Medical Puns
I only need a prescription for like half of my kitchen cabinets.
The rest are over the counter
Animal Pick Up Lines
Baby you be the tree and I'll wrap around you like a koala bear.
It's Not Easy Finding a Job...
At my first job I was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned. I just couldn't concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe. After that, I tried being a tailor, but I wasn't suited for it - mainly because it was a sew-sew job. Next, I tried working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because I got tired of the same old grind. Then, I tried being a chef - I figured it would add spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme. Next, I tried working in a deli, but any way I sliced it, I just couldn't cut the mustard. My best job was as a musician, but I eventually found I wasn't noteworthy. I studied for a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience. Next up was a job in a shoe factory - I tried hard, but I just didn't fit in. After that, I became a fisherman, but I discovered I couldn't live on my net income. Next, I managed to get a job at a pool maintenance company, but the work was too draining. So after that I got a job at a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, but I realized there was no future in it. My last job was when I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was too exhausting. So, I tried retirement! And I Found I'm PERFECT For the Job!
Tree Puns
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
Tea Puns
Have you seen that awesome video of a Koala drinking tea high up in the trees?
It’s super high Koala-tea
Spice Puns
I switched labels in my wife's spice cabinet.
She hasn't noticed, but the thyme is cumin.
So I was cleaning my spice cabinet...
and now I have a lot of thyme on my hands!
Computer Puns
Why did the person throw their computer cabinet in the air?
They wanted to store it in the cloud.
Enlglysh is a Pane
Hear eye sit inn English class; the likelihood is that eye won't pass An F on my report card wood bee worse than swallowing glass It's knot that eye haven't studied, often till late at knight Butt the rules are sew confusing, eye simply can't get them write Hour teacher says, "Heed my advice, ewe must study and sacrifice" Butt if mouses are mice and louses are lice, how come blouses aren't blice The confusion really abounds when adding esses two nouns Gooses are geese, butt mooses aren't meese; somebody scent in the clowns Two ultimatums are ultimata, and a couple of datum are data Sew wouldn't ewe expect it wood bee correct fore a bunch of plums to be plata? And if more than won octopus are octopi, and the plural of ox is oxen Shouldn't a couple of busses bee bussi and a pare of foxes bee foxen? Let's talk about spelling a wile, specifically letters witch are silent Words like "psychologist" and "wreck" shirley make awl of us violent And another example quite plane witch is really hard two explain If it's eye before e except after sea, then what about feign and reign? The final exam will determine how eye due, weather eye pass ore fail I halve prepared as much as eye can down two the last detail I'm ready two give it my vary best inn just a little wile And then isle take a relaxing wrest on a tropical aisle. (By Alan Balter)
Closet Puns
What did Papa cabinet advise to his Son cabinet before his first date?
"Just be youshelf"
Two cabinets walk out of a bar...
One says to the other, "you walking home?" and the other replies, "Nah, I'm cabinet."
Why was the cabinet maker fired on his first day?
He just couldn't get a handle on it.
How do you get into an all glass China cabinet?
Sorry, that's glassified.
One Liners for Kids
What did the tailor think of her new job? It was sew sew.
Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? He didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!
Why did the manager hire the marsupial? Because he was koala-fied.
The Lost Thesaurus
A man loses his thesaurus, which he uses all the time. He searches all over his house for it. He’s double-checked everywhere, but he just can’t find it. Fed up with searching, he decides to ask his family members. His daughter loves reading books, so he decided to ask her first. Man: "Did you take my thesaurus?" Daughter: "I didn’t take your thesaurus, I was just reading my favorite book. Maybe ask my brother? He always tries to reach into high cabinets, so he might have taken it to stand on." So the man goes off and to look for his son. He finds his son sitting on the couch, playing video games. Man: "Did you take my thesaurus?" Son: "Of course not, I hate reading. Ask mom, she might have it." So the man looks for his wife, but she isn’t home. He starts getting really frustrated. He goes to the stables to search for her. He goes in but there's just their horse standing there.The man, frustrated, decides to amuse himself. "I don't suppose YOU know where my thesaurus is, right?" Horse: "Nope. Oops, I mean Neighhhh!"
Pick Up Lines
Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koala-fications.
Valentines Day Puns
Are you a needle? Because you are sew special to me.
Boat Puns
What do you call a seamstress that snuck aboard a ship?
A sew-away!
The Government Employee
A government employee sat in his office, and out of boredom, decided to see what was inside his old filing cabinet. He poked through the contents and came across an old brass lamp he's never seen before. "This will look good on my mantel," he said, and took it home with him. While polishing the lamp, a genie suddenly appeared. "Noble sir," he thundered. "You have three wishes you may ask of me." "Alright," said the government clerk. "I would like an ice-cold Coke right now." He gets his Coke and drinks it. Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish. "I wish to be on an island with beautiful women, who find me irresistible." Suddenly, he's on an island with gorgeous women eyeing him lustfully. He tells the genie his third and last wish. "I wish I'd never have to work again." Instantly, he was back in his government office.
Koala Puns
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
What is a koala’s favorite soft drink? Koka-Koala, of course!
What is a koala bear’s favorite mixed drink? A pina koala.
What is a koala’s favorite pop singer? Koala Rae Jepsen. Her most popular song? “Koala Me Maybe”.
What is a koala’s favorite exercise?
Bearobics.
What is a koala’s favorite type of fruit? Bearies.
What is a koala’s favorite Christmas carol? Deck the halls with boughs of holly, koala-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!!!
How do koalas stay in shape? They do bearobics.
What happened when the koala house party got a little too far out of hand? One of the neighbors koalaed the cops.
Which side of a koala bear has the most fur? The outside!
Where are koalas taken when they die? To an ancient bearial site.
Was the koala able to complete the grueling 26-mile marathon? Bearly.
What do you call a koala with no teeth? A gummy bear.
There once was a koala who could run at a speed of more than 800 miles per hour. He was the first koala to break the sound bearier.
What’s the scariest koala movie ever made? The Bear Witch Project.
Besides eucalyptus leaves, what is a koala bear’s favorite vegetable? Koalaflower.
When does a Koala go "moo"? When it is learning a new language!
How do you apologize to a koala? BEAR your heart and soul.
How does a koala get from one place to another? On a gondkoala.
What’s small, furry and slightly purple? A koala holding its breath!
I tried to keep a koala in my house, but the smell was just unBEARable.
Why did the manager hire the marsupial? Because he was koala-fied.
Where do koalas go to settle legal matters? A kangaroo court!
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
How do you apologize to a koala?
Bear your heart and soul to them.
Why isn't the the koala a real bear? He doesn't have the right koalifications.
Why did the Koala cross the road? To prove to the possum that it could be done!
Travel Pick Up Lines
Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koala-fications