Scared

Why was the doctor doing diarrhia research scared?
He had seen some sh*t go down.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
Yo Mama so ugly when she went to the bathroom, she scared the crap out of the toilet.
Little Johnny and the Alligator
Little Johnny and the Alligator So one day, Grandma sent her grandson Little Johnny down to the waterhole to get some water for cooking dinner. As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and hightailed it for Grandma's kitchen. "Well now, where's my bucket and where's my water?" Grandma asked him. "I can't get any water from that water hole, Grandma" exclaimed Johnny. "There's a BIG ol' alligator down there!" "Now don't you mind that ol' alligator, Johnny. He's been there for a few years now, and he's never hurt no one. Why, he's probably as scared of you as you are of him!" "Well, Grandma," replied Johnny, "if he's as scared of me as I am of him, then that water ain't fit to drink!"
You're so ugly, you scared the crap out of the toilet.
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
What music are balloons scared of? Pop music
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
Why are cats scared of trees?
Because of their bark.
Why couldn’t the cheese sleep?
He was scared there was a munster under the bed.
So a guy is walking with a young boy into the

After a while the boy says: "Hey mister its getting dark out and I’m scared.”
“How do you think I feel?" Said the stranger. "I have to walk back alone."
What do you call really scared pasta?
Chicken noodles.
My ambition, said old Mr. King,
Is to live as a bird on the wing.
Then he climbed up a steeple,
Which scared all the people,
So they caged him and taught him to sing.