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Greatest Jokes

Funny Animal Quotes
“Dogs are great. Bad dogs, if you can really call them that, are perhaps the greatest of them all.”—John Grogan
“Some of our greatest historical and artistic treasures we place with curators in museums; others we take for walks.”—Roger Caras
Mummy Puns
How did Ozymandias became the greatest Pharaoh of Egypt?
He rammed everything that he sees
Funny Parenting Quotes
“Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world, but they are also terrorists. You’ll realize this as soon as they’re born, and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.”

- Ray Romano.
Art Puns
What did the artist tell his greatest nemesis? I challenge you to a doodle!
Coffee Puns
Everyone makes fun of him for using old coffee, but he insists it has the greatest sedimental value.
Bread Puns
Why are bread puns the greatest? They never grow mold.
Strawberry Puns
Chuck berry was undoubtedly the greatest rock and roll strawberry.
Jokes For Women
What are a married man's two greatest assets? A closed mouth and an open wallet.
Zombie Puns
Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?
Rigor Mortissen
Tableware Puns
I didn't get this "World's Greatest Dad" mug for nothing.
It cost $14.99
I gave my dad a mug for his birthday
It said "World's greatest dad". When I gave it to him he looked kind of insulted. Is something wrong with it I asked? He replied, "You spelled 'dad' backwards"
Ancient Rome Puns
What was the Romans' greatest achievement?
Learning to speak Latin!
Funny Work Quotes
“Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.” — Don Herold
Planet Puns
Beer is the greatest beverage on earth.
That's my pint of view, anyway.
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