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Far

I have been expelled from the Flat Earth Society.
Apparently, I went too far.
Why did the policeman stop you on your way home last Thanksgiving?

Because you far exceeded your feed limit.
.
How far can a mango,
If he's got a license but doesn't avocado ?
I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
How much far can you see with your naked eyes, on a clear day? 92,955,807 miles (to the sun).
The Genie granted my wish for longer arms, but he warned me My wish would have far reaching consequences.
“I intend to live forever. So far, so good.”
Steven Wright
“My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.”
Dave Barry
A wolfswagon rabbit is by far the best car you can gift a wolf.
What happened when the koala house party got a little too far out of hand? One of the neighbors koalaed the cops.
There once was a wonderful star,
Who thought she would go very far.
Until she fell down,
And looked like a clown,
She knew she would never go far.
As for beauty I am not a star,
There are others much more handsome by far.
But my face - I don't mind it,
For I am behind it,
It's the people in front that I jar.
There was a Young Person of Crete,
Whose toilette was far from complete;
She dressed in a sack,
Spickle-speckled with black,
That ombliferous person of Crete.
Are You Done With That Chili, Pal?
Are You Done With That Chili, Pal? A hungry guy really fancies a bowl of hot chili. He sees a diner just up the street, so he decides to head there. A pretty waitress shows him to his seat, and he promptly places his order. The waitress says, "Sorry, but the guy next to you got the last bowl". He looks over and sees that the guy's finished his meal, but the bowl of chili is still full. He asks, "Are you going to eat that chili?" The other guy says, "No. Help yourself". He slides the bowl of chili over and starts to eat. When he gets about halfway down, his spoon hits something. He looks down sees a dead mouse and immediately pukes all the chili back into the bowl. The other guy says, "Yeah, that's about as far as I got, too."
Why is a giraffe’s neck so long?
Because its head is so far from its body.
Every time when I see a picture of something amazing in space, I usually say “That’s totally far out.”