Full

What did the monster say when he saw a rush hour train full of passengers? Oh good! A chew chew train!
why was the ship called 3.14
because it was full of π-rates.
What do you call a boat full of high school graduates
A scholarship.
What do you call a big boat full of fish
A carp ark.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship.
“There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.”
Henry Kissinger
“My nickname is ‘Mom’, but my full name is ‘Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom’.”
Unknown
Are You Done With That Chili, Pal?
Are You Done With That Chili, Pal? A hungry guy really fancies a bowl of hot chili. He sees a diner just up the street, so he decides to head there. A pretty waitress shows him to his seat, and he promptly places his order. The waitress says, "Sorry, but the guy next to you got the last bowl". He looks over and sees that the guy's finished his meal, but the bowl of chili is still full. He asks, "Are you going to eat that chili?" The other guy says, "No. Help yourself". He slides the bowl of chili over and starts to eat. When he gets about halfway down, his spoon hits something. He looks down sees a dead mouse and immediately pukes all the chili back into the bowl. The other guy says, "Yeah, that's about as far as I got, too."
I was arrested by the grammar police for not using the full stop correctly.
I am now looking at a long sentence.
.
I’m not old. I’m aged to perfection. And full bodied.
What do you call a hospital ward full of epileptic vegetables?
Seizure salad.
Wanna know a way for werewolves to howl other than the full moon?
Make them stub their toe.
Why is the moon so conceited at times?
It becomes full of itself.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship
If a hole isn't full of water then it isn't feeling well
What do you call a tooth in a glass full of water?
A one molar solution.