"I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 32," was the reply.
"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman said happily.
A little while later she went into McDonald's and asked the counter girl the very same question.
The girl said, "I guess about 29."
The woman replied, "Nope I'm 50."
Now she was feeling really good about herself. She stopped in a drug store on her way down the street. She went up to the counter to get some mints and asked the clerk this burning question.
The clerk responded, "Oh, I'd say 30."
Again she proudly responded, "I am 50, but thank you!"
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asked an old man waiting next to her the same question.
He replied, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going...
"Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then, can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."
They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of her.
She finally blurted out, "What the hell! Go ahead."
He slipped both of his hands under her bra and began to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounced and weighed each one of her bosoms. He gently pinched them as well. He pushed her assets together and rubbed them against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she said, "Okay, okay...How old am I?"
He completed one last squeeze, removed his hands, and said, "Madam, you are 50."
Stunned and amazed, the woman said, "That was incredible! How could you tell??"
"I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
This Joke Starts With a Woman Joining a Country Club
A woman joins a country-club and sets out to play with the guys at 6.30am. She immediately impresses them with her golfing prowess...
Joke: To Heaven and Back
A woman suffers a heart attack and ends up in hospital. She has a near-death experience, but awakens. She decides to get some work done...
Joke: Lights Go Out, Naughty Comes Out...
Four people are in a train compartment together when everything goes dark. An opportunistic poor man decides to capitalize on the opportunity...
This Joke Starts With a Middle-aged Lady Going to Hospital
A woman suffers a heart attack and ends up in hospital. She has a near-death experience, but awakens. She decides to get some work done...
This Joke Starts With an Elderly Couple At a Travel Agency
Two elderly people are spotted by a travel agent at his agency's window. He promptly invites them in and discusses sending them on a dream vacation...
Joke: A Woman's Clever Answer
This woman just thought of the perfect answer to this cop's accusation.
Hilarious! Mr. Bean Didn't Expect This at Art Class!
Mr. Bean takes an art class but never did he expect that he'd have to be drawing a naked woman...
Hilarious: Mr. Bean and the Eating Competition
Mr. Bean's eating competition against a fellow guest is going swimmingly until he eats a batch of spoiled oysters...
Classic Comedy: My Blackberry Is Broken!
This is one of our favorite comedy sketches of all times!
Hilarious Signs: This Ice Cream Shop Cracked Me Up!
This collection of 12 hilarious signs will give you a taste of an excellent sense of humor!
Rodney Dangerfield, The Man of a Million One liners!
Here is a great compilation of some of his best lines and of course - his terrific delivery, Dangerfield style.
Hilarious: These Hilarious Repairs Will Really Crack You Up!
Here are 14 hilarious repair fails that are bound to give you a good laugh!
Funny Time: Get Your Giggles Going and Laugh Out Loud
16 Pictures that will make you giggle and guffaw like a hyena!
These Are the Most Absurd DIY Projects We’ve Come Across
It’s nice to do DIY projects, but this is just ridiculous.
These Cat Models Are Simply Hilarious!
These cats have chosen a modelling as their full-time careers...
So Funny: Have You Ever Seen Christmas Trees Like THESE?
These are the most unusual Xmas trees you have ever seen!
The People Behind These Funny Fails Are Beyond Reproach!
Some people simply should not be entrusted with construction or any kind of DIY work. The 15 photos you're about to see will show you exactly why!
These Wedding Day Pranks Will Leave You Gasping For Air
Hilarious wedding pranks that are guaranteed to make you laugh.
I Can't Stop Laughing at These Funny Husbands
Check out these 12 examples of husbands and boyfriends being absolutely hilarious.
Cheeky, Funny, Unapologetic Children - 20 Pics
Here are 20 funny test answers, all written by children who just couldn't be bothered.
Caution! These Ridiculous Signs Will Make You Laugh!
Many caution signs can be redundant or plain weird. Here are 25 such caution signs that will have you either laughing or scratching you head
13 Funny Palindromes That Will Make You Giggle
People have been enjoying palindromes for centuries - here are 13 funny examples that are sure to make crack you up.
These Work Safety Fails Will Make Your Hair Stand on End!
The work safety fails you’ll see in this article are not for the faint of heart. But don’t worry, no careless worker was harmed in the making of these photos!
How the Heck Did They End Up Writing THAT?
Here's a fresh dose of hilarious translation fails from different countries and languages!
Vandalism Is Not Okay. Unless It Makes You Laugh Out Loud
Vandalism is WRONG. Unless it makes you laugh out loud. Then it’s okay.
These 14 Photos Were Taken Just a Moment Before Disaster
These perfectly timed photos are hysterically funny!
Hand These Guys a Towel and Get Ready to Laugh!
This hilarious performance involves two young Frenchmen who have just a towel apiece to preserve their modesty. Watch this side-splitting performance.
All the Ladies Will Be Playing This Song Again & Again
This song celebrates the beauty and wisdom of older ladies in a hilarious way!
Hilarious: Have You Seen The New Senior Bumper Stickers?
Here are some bumper stickers specially made for the retired lifestyle!
Hilarious: Are These Weirdest Signs Ever Made?
Enjoy this hilarious compilation of weird signs that will have you in stitches!
These Wine Jokes Are All in Good Taste...
I never knew there were so many funny things to say about wine...
Can You Watch This Entire Video Without Laughing?
From guilty dogs, to funny cat fails, monkeys, funny squirrels, horses and so on. Take a look at this hilarious compilation:
15 Stupendously Meaningless Road Signs That Really Exist
Signs are meant to be visual aids, reminders that also serve as a guide. If you ever drove by these incredible road signs, would you know what to do? I wouldn't have a clue.
The Most Hilarious Way of Learning to Play an Instrument!
Part comedy, part musical lesson, you'll laugh yourself silly with this video.
Simon's Cat: A Day in the Life of a Cat Owner
Being a cat owner really changes you as a person, only cat people understand this. But everyone will get the humor in this new extended Simon's Cat episode!
These Lines are Bad Manners, But They're Funny!
We all wish we had the tenacity to be able to reply to someone being cheeky to us with the wittiest of comebacks. Here are 20 awesome rejoinders.
I Can't Stop Laughing at These Hilarious Wedding Photos
From cows making babies to groomsmen falling into the ocean, here are some of the most sidesplitting wedding photobombs you'll ever see.
These Photos Could Only Have Been Taken In China...
China is a unique country full of unique characters, and this picture series proves it!
These Fortune Cookies Will Make You Howl With Laughter
Here you’ll find a selection of some of the funniest messages to ever be found inside fortune cookies.
Hilarious: 15 Signs You Love Coffee Just a Bit Too Much
This is how you can tell if you don't just like coffee, but love it!
These Uproarious Cartoons Make Age a Hilarious Affair...
These comics show that the best way to deal with aging is to have good old laugh it!
You Won't Believe What This Little Old Lady Gets Up To...
This hilarious prank involves a sweet old lady pretending to deal drugs in large quantities in a public park...
15 Hilarious Photobombing Moments That Will Make You Laugh
Sometimes, a photobomb can result in some incredibly hilarious moments.
The Hilarious Antics of These Birds Will Make You Chuckle
Birds can be mean at times, but hilarious at the same time. Check out some of the funniest bird antics in this post.