Why did the dog cross the road?
To get out of the barking lot.
Why didn’t the flamingo cross the road?
Because he’s not a chicken.
Why didn’t the bicycle cross the road?
Because it was two tired!
Why did the monster truck drive on the sidewalk?
Because he didn’t want to run over the chicken!
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn’t — the road moved back underneath him.
Why did the corn cross the road?
Because it was being stalked.
Why did the engineer cross the road?
Because he looked in the files, and that’s what they did last time.
Why did the spy cross the road?
Because he was never on your side.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day, and it wanted people to think it was a chicken!
How did the sushi cross the road?
It was rolling.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because it was a zebra crossing.
Why did the toddler cross the road?
He wanted to pet the chicken.
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
It was picking up the chicken’s feathers.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
The chicken couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Why did the cow cross the road?
So he could go to the MOO-vies.
Why did the nose cross the road?
Because he was tired of getting picked on.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to its school.
Why did the fish cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Why did the potato run across the road?
So it wouldn’t get mashed.
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the fox cross the road?
She was chasing the chicken.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
Why did the monkey cross the road?
Because the chicken retired.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because it thought it was a chicken.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the clown cross the road?
To retrieve his rubber chicken.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side!
Why did the raccoon cross the road?
He saw you put out the garbage.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He had something to cock-a-doodle dooo!
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Why is everyone mad when the pig crosses the road?
Because he’s a road hog.
Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baa-baa shop for a haircut.