Wants Jokes

My birch of a wife just told me she wants a divorce. Says sheโ€™s tired of all of my tree puns.
Are those Guess jeans? Because guess who wants to get into them.
Did you heard about the zombie crow? He wants to eat your grains.
My daughter wants a horse...
But first we need a stable income.
What do you call a kid who wants to cannibalise his siblings?
A munchkin.
My wife said she wants me to consider purchasing a decent telescope for the family to use.
I told her Iโ€™d look into it.
"Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?"
What do you call an onion who wants to go on romantic dates in Paris? A French onion.
My wife wants to start selling kitchenware online.
I just don't see it panning out.
โ€œMarriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?โ€โ€”Groucho Marx
Who does the nectarine just do a hair transplant? Because it wants to become a peach.
Pan wants to lead his kind to rebellion, but...
He can't get no Satyr Faction.
Take a vampire to a bar, and you don't need to ask what he wants to drink. He'll have a Bloodweiser.
Is your name Rapunzel, cause I need a girl who never leaves the bedroom and constantly wants me to pull her hair?
Youโ€™re the girl that everybody wants. Today is their lucky day.
Want to start your day laughing? Register to our Daily Joke!
Did you mean:
Continue With: Facebook Google
By continuing, you agree to our T&C and Privacy Policy