How do you confuse a blond?
Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
I saw a squirrel throw up today! It was nuts!

What do you call a holy squirrel?
A chipmunk.
When I was young, my dad used to throw quarters at my head whenever I acted up.
He said, “Maybe this’ll knock some scents into you.”
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Ice cream!
Ice cream who?
Ice cream if you throw me in the cold, cold water!
How do you start a rave? Throw a flash light into an epileptic children’s ward.
How do you stop a man from raping you? Throw him the remote control.
You may think these limericks are crass
and throw me a comment to sass
but I will agree
to some degree
and I’ll still show you the crack of my ass
An extremely slim model, Miss Slater,
Was attacked by a croc and it ate 'er.
Said her trainer, Tough deal,
What a horrible meal,
We should throw it some greens and potater.
Roses are Red
Violets are blue
If I had a brick
I’d throw it at you.
If I throw a stick, will you leave?
What do you get when you throw a hand grenade into a French bathroom?
Linoleum Blownapart.
What do sloths throw in winter? Slowballs.
What do snakes do when they get angry?
They throw hissy fits.
Why should you never throw a snake like a boomerang?
Because it’ll come back to bite you.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?