Stolen Jokes

What do you call a stolen jar?
A free mason.
You’ve stolen my heart. I hereby place you under cardiac arrest.
"Can you empty your pocket? I believe you have stolen my heart."
- Leverage
"Someone's stolen the grass from my garden," said the man looking forlorn.
Salami get this straight, you've stolen my heart.
You've stolen a pizza my heart.
My collection of Swiss watches was stolen in Spain.
Adios Omegas.
How do you know a flmaingo has stolen your shoes?
Only one shoe is missing.
The Grinch may have stolen Christmas, but you stole my heart.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
How do you know a flmaingo has stolen your shoes?
Only one shoe is missing.
I'm still figuring out how to properly wear a face covering. Before I could master the art I was robbed of my beloved mask...
It was stolen from right under my nose.
When I heard my sofa had been stolen, I thought “I’m not going to take this sitting down”.
I came home to find many folders, calendars and filing cabinets were stolen.
Police believe it to be the work of organised crime.
How do you keep your violin from being stolen?
Put it in a viola case.
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