A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of real alligator shoes in the worst way, but she didn't want to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!" The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!" Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator. Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home, when he spots the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he sees a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She takes aim, kills the creature and with a great deal of effort hauls it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then the blonde flips the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Darn, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"

Bobby had just bought an incredibly shiny pair of shoes and was very proud of them. Curious about just how shiny they were, the not-so-decent Bobby decided to put them to the test. He went to a bar and approached a woman in a dress. “Excuse me, ma’am,” Bobby asked, “are you wearing green underwear?” Surprised, she said, “Yes… I am. How did you know?” He grinned. “I must be wearing the shiniest shoes in the world.” Feeling confident, he walked up to another woman, wearing a skirt. “Excuse me, are you wearing red underwear?” “Yes,” she replied, shocked. Now fully convinced of his shoes’ brilliance, he approached a third woman in a dress. This time, he hesitated . “Excuse me, ma’am… are you not wearing any underwear?” “No, I’m not,” she said. “Why?” Bobby let out a huge sigh of relief and said, “Oh, thank God. I thought there was a hole in my shoe.”