Shoes

Why did the blond enter the tennis courts naked?
Because the sign said tennis shoes only.
Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He’s a mile away and you’ve got his shoes!
Billy Connolly
My dog has expensive taste in shoes.
So I got her some Jimmy Chews.
A Dutchman has invented shoes that record how many miles you've walked.
Clever clogs.
There was an Old Man of the Wrekin
Whose shoes made a horrible creaking
But they said, 'Tell us whether,
Your shoes are of leather,
Or of what, you Old Man of the Wrekin?'
Yo mama so fat if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word for it.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.
What kind of shoes do all spies wear? Sneakers.
What kind of shoes do private investigators wear?
Sneak-ers.
Ice hockey is basically just guys wearing knife shoes fighting each other with long sticks for the last Oreo.
Why do the blondes prefer to have se* instead of bowling?
The balls are lighter, and you don't have to change shoes.
A Blonde in Louisiana
A Blonde in Louisiana A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of real alligator shoes in the worst way, but she didn't want to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!" The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!" Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator. Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home, when he spots the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he sees a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She takes aim, kills the creature and with a great deal of effort hauls it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then the blonde flips the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Darn, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"
Can I tie your shoes? I don’t want you falling for anyone else.
If a crocodile makes shoes, what does a banana make ? Slippers