Screw

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A llama.
How many middle-hitters do you need to screw in a light bulb? Only one, but the the setter has to put it perfectly in their hand first.
How many volleyball referees do you need to screw in a light bulb? None because they are always in the dark.
If I was a robot and you were one 2 if I lost a nut would you give me a screw.
Why can’t you screw with whales?
because they hump back.
How many Winter Park ski instructors does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to screw it in, and two to say, "Nice Turns, Nice Turns!"
How many Chinese folks does it take to screw in a light bulb?
They don't change lightbulbs, then just dim sum.
How man Sorority girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, One to screw it in, and one to take a picture.
How many Emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
What kind of driver never get a parking ticket? A screw driver
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to screw in the bulb and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
How many "friendzoned" guys does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw.
There once was a man from Racine
Who was an amazing fu**ing machine
Both concave and convex
He could screw either s*x
and jerk himself off in between.
How many light bulbs
Does it take to screw a shrink?
Oh, got it backwards.