Female Jokes

What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
What do you call a female clown?
April Fools.
The female janitor at my office asked me if I would like to smoke some weed with her.
I said no. I can't deal with high maintenance women.
I just flew on a plane with an all female flight crew.
It was an....unmanned aircraft.
How do you know if a tiger is male or female?
Throw a rock at it. If he runs it's a male. If she runs it's a female.
What do you do to a female news anchor who breaks a leg?
You put her in a broadcast.
How to determine the gender of your cat?
pour some milk in a bowl and place it next to the cat, if she drinks it, your cat is a female, but if he drinks it, the cat is a male
Did you hear about the new Netflix series? The one about a couple of poor female artists living in 1600s Rome?
I think it's called Two Baroque Girls
Why is it impossible to have a balanced conversation with a female mushroom? - Because shiitake too much!
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
What is a female "Douchebag" in France called??
A douche-baguette.
Why did the female chef win the cook-off?
Because cheese grater!
Hey I need a female opinion - what do you think would look better on me, this or this?
Too Hot For TV Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Se*?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
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