Pressure Jokes

Q: Why did the cloud do drugs and join a gang?
A: Atmospheric pressure.
The dock keeps floating above the river because of the pier- pressure.
Cooking is bad for my anxiety.
I had to throw away my pressure cooker.
I applied for a job as an Instructor at a Scuba Diving center. The interviewer wanted to know if I can work well under pressure.
Avoid pier pressure.
"There’s one advantage to being 102, there’s no peer pressure." - Dennis Wolfberg
At a recent job interview, the hiring manager
asked me if I can perform under pressure.
I said: "No, but I can do Bohemian Rhapsody."
Why did the orange become juice?
It couldn't handle the pressure.
My wife was trying to feed our son a pear, and he was refusing.
I said, Good news. Our son is immune to pear pressure.
What do you call a pear in a compressor?
Pear pressure!
“A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.” — Henry Kissenger
Why did the orange turn into orange juice?
It couldn’t handle the pressure.
Artists know how to draw the line, so you can't really peer pressure them.
Why do all kids want to be an astronaut?
Because there is no pressure.
Why did the strawberry get bruised? Because it was under pear pressure.
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