Hobby Jokes

What is a dog’s favorite hobby?
Collecting fleas.
The Helpful Neighbor I've lived a few years in my home, and the pretty neighbour next door and I always flirted with each other, despite her being married. One day, when speaking to her husband, he said: "I need to have my apartment painted, but I work all day and I get tired. I tried to hire a professional painter but the guy asked me for the an arm and a leg..." At that moment, I just had a brilliant idea. "Don't sweat it, neighbor! I'm on vacation and painting walls is my favorite hobby! It would be a pleasure to do this task." The husband accepted the offer gladly. I don't want to brag about my conversation skills, but I barely started to paint the apartment and I already had that woman in bed with me. But, bad luck... We were just starting and I did not expect the husband to forget his documents and that, for that reason, he had to return home at that specific moment. The neighbor, listening to her husband opening the door, runs to the bathroom, and the guy enters the room and finds me, naked, at the top of the ladder, with my brush on the wall, painting. Screaming, he shouts at me: "What the heck is this? You started painting in my bedroom, and NAKED?" "Hey buddy, I'm working for free, so I start wherever I want!" "But naked?" "You really wanted me to stain my new clothes with paint?" "And with a boner, you bastard?" "And just where am I going to hang the darn bucket!?!"
I once had a gerbil named Bobby,
Who had an unusual hobby.
He chewed on a cord,
and now -- oh my lord,
now all that's left is a blobby.
Witches get so excited to decorate their cauldron because their favorite hobby is witchcraft.
What's a shark's favorite hobby?
Anything he can sink his teeth into.
What’s a werewolve's favorite hobby?
Collecting fleas!
What is a mushroom’s favorite hobby? - Spore-t!
Scuba diving is a good hobby... if you wanna hit rock bottom.
"What are your thoughts on diving?"
"Well, I guess it's descent as a hobby."
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