Why did the corn farmer go to jail?
He was stalking someone in a field.
I thought of a new joke that started in a corn field.
But I'm not going to post it bc it's too corny.
Did you hear about the corn stalk that changed careers?
He went into a different field!
What happened to the football team that practiced in a corn field?
They got creamed!
Why did the corn stalks hold a ceremony in honor of the scarecrow?
To corn-gratulate him for being out standing in their field!
Just because your football team calls itself the unicorns doesn’t mean they can play in the corn field.
A farmer in the field with his cows counted 196 of them, but when he rounded them up he had 200.
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
Why did the quarterback suddenly walk off the field?
The coach told him to take a hike!
Revenge of the Melon Farmer
Revenge of the Melon Farmer There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch at night and eat his watermelons. After some careful thought, he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure. He made up a sign and posted it in the field. The next night, the kids showed up and they saw the sign which read, "Warning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide." The kids ran off, made up their own sign and posted it next to the farmer's. When the farmer returned, he surveyed the field. He noticed that no watermelons were missing, but the sign next to his read: "Now there are two!"
IT vs. Management
IT vs. Management A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field." "You must work in IT," says the balloonist. "I do" replies the man. "How did you know?" "Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone." The man below replies, "You must work in management." "I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?" "Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."
Son: does Easter Bunny set out 12 eggs in the field to search for?
Dad: no he dozen’t.
How did the sheep farmer become best in his field?
Shear luck.
Thought I saw a zebra in a field near my house recently, turned out to be a horse in his pyjamas.
Why was the scarecrow upset with the worm?
It was going ear to ear in the corn field!