Brand Jokes

Q: What brand of underwear do pharaohs wear?
A: Fruit of the Tomb.
So I was standing in the grocery store comparing the prices of a couple packs of hummus when my roommate came up to me and suggest the off brand roasted red pepper kind to which I replied:

"Ya, I'm not really sure about that brand. They seem to be very hit and hummus for me."

He was not impressed.
I'm going to start a hummus brand that comes in really difficult to open containers.
It's gonna be called 'hummus posta eat this'.
What brand of hand soap do telephone operators use? Dial.
In Italy there is a group pf moms creating soft cheese...
They brand themselves as MOMzarella.
There is a certain brand of printer I don't throw away
I am my Brothers keeper.
ALDI grocery stores have announced their new store brand peanuts.
ALDI’s nuts.
Los Angeles International Airport should sell their own brand of laxatives called LAXatives.
What did the teenage crow want for his birthday? A brand new caw!
I just installed a brand new Luxe bidet!
I’ve been having a blast.
My Dad told me why Busch is the only brand of beer he ever drinks.
"It's the only beer that says it's name when you open it."
What is soap's favorite brand of beer?
Babe, you are the only brand I desire and I want no substitution.
What is Halloween's favorite medicine?
Any brand of coffin cold.
Are you a brand new racing suit? Because you make me forget how to breathe.
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