Biggest Jokes

"Going out with you would be my biggest break since the rural juror."
- 30 Rock
What is the biggest type of bed ?
The sea bed.
Who was the biggest prankster in George Washington's army?
The biggest irony in the world's history is that the Russian alphabet has no letters in lowercase. It is all Capitalization.
“The biggest thing I remember is that there was just no transition. You hit the ground diapering.”

- Paul Reiser.
My town always holds a contest to see which beer drinker's belly is biggest by seeing how far it goes past a line...
That's the paunch-line.
"The biggest difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less." ~ Brendan Behan
I just went to a fireworks shop and asked for their biggest bomb. They gave me a picture of you
My biggest problem with having three square meals a day is that all my plates are round.
Who are the biggest fans at the theatre? The backstage crew - They're always giving props to the actors.
I'm Sneaky Bill, I'm terrible and mean and vicious,
I steal all the cashews
from the mixed-nut dishes.
I eat all the icing but I won't touch the cake,
And what you won't give me,
I'll go ahead and take.
I gobble up the cherries from everyone's drinks,
And whenever there are sausages
I grab a dozen links;
I take both drumsticks if
there's turkey or chicken,
And the biggest strawberries
are what I'm pickin';
I make sure I get the finest chop on the plate,
And I'll eat the portions of anyone's who's late.
I'm always on the spot before the dinner bell--
I guess I'm pretty awful

(William Cole)
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
I may not be the biggest football fan, but I love tight ends.
The Arizona desert's full of cacti, but I've got the biggest prick.
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