There once was a vicar at Kew Who kept his pet cat in a pew. He taught it to speak alphabetical Greek, but it never got farther than µ.
Greek vs. Italian
Two old men are arguing about history and the splendors of athens and Rome.
the Greek man says "Look, all I'm saying is that the Greeks invented everything the Romans get credit for!"
The Italian says "Yes, may be, but the Romans improved it and made it useful!"
The Greek man says "We invented the Democracy!"
The Italian says "We realized the challenge of direct elections and the benefit of the legislature, and thus created the Republic!"
The Greek man says "Yes, but we created beautiful architecture like the Parthenon!"
The Italian says "And we improved your building techniques, and used them to create aqueducts and structures that stood for centuries longer!"
The Greek man, frustrated, finally says "Ah, of course. But the Greeks, we INVENTED lovemaking!"
The Italian man says "That may be true, but WE introduced it to women!"
European Heaven is where:
All the cops are British,
All the wine is French,
All the cars are German,
All the lovers are Italian,
The weather is Greek,
And everything is organized by the Swiss.
European Hell is where:
All the cops are French,
All the wine is German,
All the cars are Greek,
All the lovers are Swiss,
The weather is British,
And everything is organized by the Italians.
The Greeks make the best cheese You feta believe it!
What's the difference between Greek yogurt and regular yogurt? Greek yogurt has a rich cultural history.
What is a Greek dog’s favorite dessert? Barklava!
I'll be making a movie about the Greek alphabets. It's a Psi Phi film.
What do you call the Greek God of Mexican chickens? Apollo
What sound does a Greek cow make? "μ"
What does a Greek machine need to work? Greece.
Which ancient Greek Philosopher had a foot fetish? Play-toe. Or was it Sock-rates?
How do you get in contact with a Greek architect? You column.
What does a Greek God say when they answer the phone? "Whodisious?"
What do you call the Greek version of Spider-Man? Pita Parker.
What did the prehistoric Greeks call their goddess of love? Troglodite.
What happens when Greeks come back from war? They get a gyro’s welcome.
What do you call a Greek love song? An Aphro-ditty.
Have you seen the Greek book that became a movie? You odyssey it.
I can't stand Greek salads. I like un-feta'd access to my greens.
What do you call a Greek philosopher who loves rice? Arisotto.
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia? He was the Don of Time itself!
How do Greek gods say sorry to one another "I Apollo-gise"
Historians have discovered a new Greek God who didn’t excel at anything. His name was mediocretese.
In Greek Mythology, Chiron was not only half man and half horse, he was also a doctor of medicine That made him the centaur for disease control.
What's the name of the machine the ancient greeks used to calculate how best to fight hybrid monsters? The antichimera mechanism.
My son asked me, what’s a Greek urn? I said, “about 20 drachmas a day.”
I guess you can say my misunderstanding of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles Elbow.
My son claims that he identifies as an ancient Greek string instrument. Frankly, I think he's a lyre.
A company from Israel took over the Greek national cheese factory in Greece Now it's called the Cheeses of Nazareth.
An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants. ‘’Euripides’’ says the tailor. ‘’Yeah, Eumenides?’’ replies the man.
A lot of William Shakespeare’s plays were based off of old Greek and Roman performances That's playgarism if you ask me.
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
A few years ago, I had a job translating pre-Classical Greek literature into Braille. It feels like ancient history.
Other people had drugs in school, but I brought Greek cheeses. That way I could have math and feta cheese.
Son: "Dad, why'd you name me Odysseus? He's from greek mythology." Dad: "Well son, you broke through the trojan wall."
I was at a thrift store and the guy ahead of me was purchasing an antique urn made in Greece He asked the cashier if she knew how much a Greek urns.
A soda can, a gas tank and the Greek god Eros walked into a bar? The bartender shook his head, “Here comes trouble.” A patron at the bar said, “What’s wrong?” The bartender replied, “Those guys get together and they become cantankeros.”