The favorite soccer position for ghosts is the ghoul keeper.
If ten zombies run after you, what time is it?
Ten after one.
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
Why do the ladies love baseball?
Because diamonds are a girl's best friend.
How do ski instructors get to work?
By icicle.
I’m never board when I’m at the pool.
What do you call a diving dog?
A sub woofer.
We’re calling your number.
What is a volleyball player’s favorite drink? Sets on the Beach.
Why did the blonde skier cut a hole near the top of her boyfriend's ski parka?
She wanted to give him the cold shoulder.
Why don't skeletons ski the black diamond runs at Copper Mountain?
They've got soul, but they just don't have the heart for it.
Did you know Karl Marx's sister invented the starting pistol?
Her name was Onya Marx.
In later years was the Great One in decline? Yes he was on the Wayne.
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens. He was learning how to draw fowls.
Where do fish sleep? In a river bed
Why did the basketball player sign up for a crafting class?
He wanted to learn how to make baskets.
What does a runner lose after winning the race?
His breath.
What happens if the Grim Reaper spikes the ball? You have to dig your own grave.
The goal nine yards
[Bundled Up Guy] This is what you call man coverage.
Basketball is the only sport where the basket is filled but never gets full.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
I know an untidy guy who’s excellent at playing soccer.
What a Messi guy.
Ed Belfour's new contract offer isn't high compared to other goal tenders.
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
The density of this concrete leads me to believe one thing: it is a hard court.
The beauty with bowling is that you can get three strikes, but you still remain in the game.
Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players?
They dribble all the time.
How do recreational league baseball players stay so cool?
They sit among their fans.
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor after my first day at work.
Deep down I realized it wasn’t for me.
Why did the blonde skier only wear one boot?
Channel 7's weatherman said there was a 50% chance of snow.
Good bowlers always keep their minds out of the gutter.
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
When the going gets tough, let the pins fall where they may.
Grasshoppers do not fancy soccer matches because most of them prefer cricket matches.
What do you call a Sith Lord who likes to go fishing? Darth Wader.
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
Why is a Tornado the best type of football player?
Because it always gets touchdowns.
I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air. I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.
A guy walks into the bar.
It's hardly surprising he didn't make the steeplechase team, on reflection.
What does the pope eat during lent? Holy mackerel!
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There was a team member bar tending who could serve spiked drinks.
. What do you call it when you heard the same jogger pun earlier, yet laughed again?
A running joke.
When the basketball realized all the checks were bouncing, he decided to visit the bank himself to find out.
Longfellow is the known poet of basketball.
What type of pool do mechanics like best?
The car pool!
My strategy is simple, knocking them down a pin at a time.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
What did the mathematician do at the baseball game?
Square root for the home team.
Get in the swim this summer.